Friday, January 22, 2010


A sight that would be impossible to forget for ones entire lifetime, the entire skyline of the city was visible from this remote hilltop getaway of our’s. A year had passed since we’d met, three complete strangers searching for acceptance and kind of clueless about what we'd do next.”Hey, Ron, watchout man, you’ll fall, it’s a long way down you bastard “screamed Gaurav,who was still unable to find his specs and thus couldn’t make out that Ron was doing all right.” When I was back in school, we had the same kind of place where we ended up on weekends. It leaves you with a nice feeling, relieves you of daily frustrations or perhaps leaves you with heightened sensibilities.” I knew how heightened they’d get and also knew how long they lasted, probably a day or two at most. A day of life probably makes it wear and to it’s defense ,perhaps it should.It was 2 in the morning and i was beginning to doubt the sense in this exercise of ours.Thats the point when i realized that the two idiots next to me had an exam the next day and this wasn't helping them.They were on top of a hill , six hours away from a test that would affect their grade point severely and they picked this.Dynamics between guys always amazed me.Girls have the liberty of speaking their hearts out whenever they feel like,guys on the other hand have the burden of expressing themselves while keeping in mind the fact that they're guys.Why...i wondered, no longer is man barbaric and going out hunting to come back and feed his family. The redundance of the very concept is a feeding ground for a bulk of jokes directed towards the "macho,retrosexual" kinds who like their silence and bodies to do the talking.Not that there is anything wrong with being that way but we all know that it's a fading race.Im not advocating metrosexuality but thats what seems to be dominating tribe of late(now doing lux advertisements though is just pushing it), the men who are soft spoken, respect their women and are pseudo-sensitive..(that's the most they can get).I've always felt the need to tell people what i've felt irrespective of what others might feel.If i had a buck for everytime I've been referred to as a homosexual, I'd be a millionaire by now.But then, why feel something and not express it,how many aspects and dimensions of one's life can be affected by the society's perspective on it.That night was the night before i left college and these two guys are friends of mine who decided we'd go on a midnight trek to bid farewell on a high!!I know,probably sounds very stupid,but it wasn't, Im someone who is dubbed thankless and ungrateful from time to time....that night i will never forget.And about being thankless,it's been six months since that day and everytime i think about it, i still feel the need to call either of them and tell them how "@#$%ing awesome" that was.Everyone has moments like these where gestures made by people make you feel important and special,I felt like writing this a long time back,it's just that I didn't know how to.The most therapeutic thing one can do when feeling low is reliving mments like these(I dont have too many), the sadness seems to vanish within minutes.That night ended with us getting bruised abdly as we had make our way down a rather steep hill at 4 in the morning.The best part was how we sat at bottom motionless after walking for hours at a stretch when we were metres away from habitation just because one of my friends was afraid of stray dogs.Spiders,gashes from rocks,thorns in our backs,broken slippers(yeah i know..we did it in slippers,the trek you perverts) and a stray pup held us up.I know there'd be alot more occasions in life where i'd probaly feel the same way or even better,but this was just the best farewell anyone perhaps could have widhed for.
Im straight
You know who

Wednesday, January 20, 2010


"Fraandships",i know its kind of cliched now to make fun of the fraandships lot but this isn't doing that.There are extroverts,introverts,people who drool in public and those who are socially autistic.Mild deviations from these broad catagories and we've pretty much got everyone covered .Most of the people i can associate with including myself fit into the last of the four(well,not entirely but somewhat there).I read a book a while back by this Brit stand up artiste named Will Smith, it was called "How To be cool".Well, for starters , if you stop writing books that claim to know the secret to being socially accepted ,that is the first baby step towards being there.The rest I'm clueless about and would claim to be always cause it would put me in the same boat as the wannabe "Guru(stretched u, mind you)" Will bhaiya. India is a densely populated country comprising people from various backgrounds with varying education standards,why pick on those who aren't as fortunate by mocking their language skills.What's worse is the kinds who derive pleasure from mocking people's language skills are one's who at most can be said to have glossy (*read superficial,rather shiny*) english . Unless one's Amitava Ghosh or a Vikram Seth, what purpose does a language serve,communication right.So there are people who will say fraandships and others who woudln't know better and will do fraandships with them,and they'll be happy.(Its about time we let them be and started feeling the same)
(I have nothing against those who i discuss below,and even if i did,they would never know because a true member of the below dicussed league would never consider himself to be there..small advice,stop picking on people,if picking means so much,try something else,like your nose or a Wren and Martin textbook)
*Instances of shiny/superficial speaking ishtuds*
1. Excessive use of dude,like,the works...
2. heavily accented hindi thrown in out of context.
3. "Seriously bro,I watch only English movies"(I jokingly watch only hindi movies!!seriously!!)
Life is a race,you have to outrun the others.Do it guys , by all means,no stopping you, the least you could though would be turn around and give the person behind you a smile. : ).It's not that tough.
Race Away
You know who

Monday, January 18, 2010

getting away from ish for a bit...

Family Guy has got to be the funniest show ever.

Humour . Well , that for me is what saves people from snapping no matter what they possibly could be going through. I went back to my college for a week , it was a trip to unwind and as my sister keeps preaching (attain closure). I’ve yet to come across a person who in my opinion is not complicated. Why exist anyway with the most complicated and capable brain among other living beings and waste it by not letting thoughts and emotions flow. Not everyone though is confident enough to tap their thoughts and try to follow their impulse irrespective of views imposed on them. People who strive to make others laugh can only facilitate spreading some cheer here and there and it’s a highly respectable clan but the one’s I’m in awe of are the ones who strive to make themselves laugh . Not the person to their right or the person they secretly admire , just themselves. I hardly seem to know anyone except for this one person whose claim is that the point of humour is to make oneself happy. That forced me to think that how a person is ready to drive one’s thought process to keep oneself happy,only for some time mind you. Not that it’s a very noble trait but I’d trade noble for happy anyday , anyone would. I know how many times I’ve felt terrible and covered it up with an outburst of lame ,cheeky(usually perv) one liners. I’m also aware of the fact that there needs to be a degree of sensitivity to issues faced by those surrounding you , but why should a troubled person going through the ordeal of “spreading sunshine” when there’s a powercut at his place. Speaking of sunshine , a friend of mine was explaining to me how the solar eclipse that just occurred was lucky for her. Pause. Longer Pause. Pregnant pause(this phrase really amuses me, felt the need to throw it in).Now really , I doubt the moons orbit has anything to do with the desires and wishes of a little speck millions of kilometers away. If it did , family guy wouldn’t be the funniest show ever. There definitely needs to a be heightened sense of life to come up with the confidence to create an animation based cartoon that is full of taboo slurs , ridicules the nicest of people , the hottest of celebrities for the vaguest reasons. I know this has nothing to do with the moon’s orbit but well, watch Family guy. Getting back to what I love most , I saw this movie called Chance Pe Dance. The critics trashed it though I think the movie deserves a watch , multiple times if possible. Freaky Friday talks about the chance encounter I had with a lala director(chakki turned cinematography bracket, who predominate the scene I figure).

Freaky Friday

It’s Friday, what’s the first thing that strikes one’s mind, apart from the fact that the tiresome week has called it quits and given some respite to say the least. All that I can seem to associate Friday’s to are the rebellious director’s attempt to make a situational comedy or the rather amusing ‘saand’(buffalo for those who went to school outside India or for those who have never had any verbal contact with a red blooded Indian whose eyeing a fat boy) turned ‘stud’, son of a distributors ambitious debut. I love movies and I know you do, which kind is the question. In my opinion , every movie deserves a watch and find that I get along quite easily with those who share this view. The mutual understanding of catching up at the nearest PVR for the ‘dud’ movie trashed by all critics is admirable and somehow hope that this smoothness and efficiency runs into other departments of life. I had a dream sometime back, where I was talking to a loaded film director who was banking on his next venture starring the struggler whose considered divine looking but hated by critics(probably for not reciprocating after being hit on by them).This is what my conversation with him seemed like.Who are critics ? These high profile ex-filmmakers almost made breakthroughs in the crossover cinema bracket but found they’d go bankrupt and claimed they had no interest(read skill/talent/money) for making commercial cinema. So they either make up for these inadequacies by venting out frustration on all movies they review and occasionally throw in a good word or two(every single letter of it at a price, mind you) or by mocking tacky sets in their columns and talking about the affairs of the star more than his acting. I was woken up from my deep sleep only to realize that I had a definite perspective when it came to film reviews, and a certain man named Khalid Mohammed(Sir, it takes heaps of courage and talent to make a movie with Hrithik Roshan and an actress of Kirron Kher’s calibre flop , so why exactly are you an authority on film making again!!.) . I feel the rating system is toying with the integrity of the artiste whose made the movie. There is definitely a lot of effort going into putting together a sustained audio video compilation which has a certain coherence that could help it be termed as a movie. Movies are like buildings , the director being the architect and the actors being the civil engineers, from the brick layer to the silly actress crying because her exquisite pup doesn’t have air conditioning around it are involved head to toe in the project. But, as non seriously as I may take them, there is one thing for sure , their profession fits my description of what is the perfect kind of job. Who wouldn’t want a job where your boss would have moles planted around multiplexes and probably expect you to start signing in attendance near the popcorn vending machine.
Wish life was that easy.As the anticipation rises high as the week proceeds towards a Friday , I can’t wait to see my favourite actor whose back in action after quite some time.
you know who...

Sunday, January 10, 2010



1.Meet Ish

Ibn-e Batuta, wonder why I can’t stop humming the stupid song, thought Ish as he tried working on another game of solitaire. He’d almost reached to a stage where he had managed to convince himself that solitaire played a major role in sharpening ones mind and started setting silly unrealistic goals(like completing it within a minute)which to his astonishment,was a target he had almost achieved and was freaking himself out majorly.He looked around for a DVD he hadn’t seen twice already in the past week and would give up an arm to find one of that kind, Ish would repeat movies like reincarnation episodes of a hindi television soap(which basically means for those of you are reading this and are blissfully unaware of the happenings on these shows,that he lost count of the number of times he’d see one movie.). He would remember dialogues of movies people his age didn’t know existed. Ok then , Ish is basically someone whose preparing for an exam referred to as the IELTS, it’s required for those who plan to go to Oz land to pursue their academic goals. Well basically, he didn’t know much about Australia, all he seemed to know was that this test required you to speak for about five minutes and one could actually get into a Uni based on ones performance In the five minute interview. And not to mention , girls,he liked his girls. They fascinated him, for someone who was from a boy’s school where kids would be afraid of taking their sisters on award distribution days and investitures considering the constant hooting that would surround the sisters. Seep Boyz(As this girl he overheard eating samosas in Karol bagh put it).Well , he was a Seep Boy , but a smart one and he knew it. What irked him constantly was how desperate people were in order to prove themselves better than the others and how they claimed that one needs to be confident of ones abilities to outperform someone,well,if you’re so confident of your abilities,why do you have to work your behinds of to outdo people time and again(Contradicting bastards he’d think, “kaisa hai bhai”he’d say) . He passed out of a school in Delhi and studied Science in school. Now he intended to go and study Business Administration and Finance(Why!!Coz it took lesser time than other professional courses).

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Demi Gods

Imran Khan claims that he enjoys the demi god status that actors who love their work and are proficient at it do.Good for him.I dont have much time to discuss him.In fact I dont have time to discuss anyone with minimal talent and influential uncles.They can continue making movies which involve bungee jumping and no scripts.Speaking of bungee jumping, a certain friend recently had an opportunity to do it and thats when I asked myself, that whats the point...??Very good,first,jumping of a bridge with a harness and free falling 150 metres down,what are you left with it at the end of the ordeal.Yes, a high pulse rate,my alternative to that is cheaper.Five years worth consumption of low density lipids and you'd have the same pulse rate walking up the stairs everyday.So for all you adventure sports freaks,crank up the calories and you'll have your share of fun till the day collapse on the stairs. Getting back to imran , his uncle though received an apology from a certain man named Mr. Bhagat.Why..I dont know .Maybe because the sales of his paperback version of the VVC produced superhit have got a second wind and because the fat cheque made him realise how is book is not even vaguely close to the aamir khan starrer.Small mercy he hasn't taken on Deepak Tijori for not mentioning him prominently in the credits of HELLO.Considering the script of that movie matched his book bit by bit, he should claim royalty for all the success the movie received(Or he could just file for Bankruptcy).People all over India are moaning the death of World Space Radio.The company had filed for bankruptcy and finally went off air in India a week back.Im moaning the fact that half our composers will now have to pull out their dust laden harmoniums and the fact that others will just start acting.
Aman Ki Asha guys,check it out.
Shantanu Anam

Monday, January 4, 2010

Sans Siblings


You love them ,hate them, love them, but still feel the need to pour out the minutest details of yours life to them, most of the times well aware of the fact that their reaction isn’t what you’re looking for and also aware of the high possibility of being ignored entirely. So before I’m asked to visit a shrink , I’d like to state that I’m an only child, and a somewhat indulged one at that, so don’t blame me. I have always failed to understand the mechanism of relationships between siblings, actually, come to think of it, what irk me more are the relationships between same sex siblings. I’m a firm believer in the theory that people come into this world with certain innate characteristic traits which cannot be altered much no matter what dynamic changes come about in their socioeconomic settings. Yes, a few attributes of ones life can be changed, in terms of superficial qualities like fashion sense and one’s wallet, but these aren’t exactly what we could term things that define a person. The innate characteristics that I’m talking about are formed primarily based on the parents and what’s been force fed by them slowly but surely into a child’s mind during his formative years .Now, what I’ve noticed among siblings is that due to this procedure being the same in all their cases , in four out of five cases the kids are freakishly similar till they are about say twelve. Once the delirious combination of adolescence and puberty strikes a year from then, they seem to try too hard to realize themselves socially in terms of distinguishing themselves from the others and also breaking free from their shackles of uniformity which has surrounded them until then. (Here’s a deal, if you’ve read this and are deeply disgusted, I allow you to track me down and pulverize me, I don’t need to mention that your siblings are welcome to do the same.)Getting back to where I was, so what one finds is that if one ends up garrulous, the other’s reticent. For me the complication is reduced when it comes to different sex siblings. The simple equations which are evident in these cases is elder=protective and younger=loudmouth. Honestly though I feel that nothing could be better than having a friend you can share your darkest secrets and crudest jokes with and if two brothers manage to work out such a relationship, I could only term it magical.

Cheers as I give my cousin a call and check on how he’s doing!!!!!

This was one of three articles i had written hoping to get an internship at a newspaper.Considering that isnt going to happen, i figure ill have to wait till im forty five and then perhaps have an important and substantial column like Vir Sanghvi's(Read it,it's killer,he talks about Latvian Food and its shortcomings an d how sauces from Bosnia and Sarajevo must be tried with exotic cheese...burp..sorry just finished my bread pakora )
Anyway thats a long time from now,one must be really qualified to eat and be critical of food at exorbidantly expensive restaurants perhaps.

Shantanu Anam

Gully Cricket at 5


All of us have at some stage in life been associated with gully cricket, it’s a sport played by the “bad” boys who threaten to beat up smaller kids when they claim their turn to bat and the “good” boys who’ve just about managed to finish their homework and are just still silently sulking about losing that one mark in an arithmetic test while playing. In my opinion, going by what I saw around me, the stereotypical tags of the good kids from the bad vanish as soon as their gully cricket days end. As they graduate from this stage, they move on to either just sitting home and focusing on their respective first person shooter preferences or walking around the same place lecherously looking at girls who were cycling around them say a year back when they were too busy chasing the felt ball wearing shorts. Another thing about gully cricket is that it’s perhaps the only place where the meritorious lot are appreciated. (Ps. We ignore the clich├ęd “it’s my bat, I’m not out”). Those two hours, these kids mean business; they want the good players on their side, irrespective of the fact that whether the bowler’s dad goes to work in a Merc or on a cycle. As long as he knocks over wickets, it doesn’t matter .Most of these alliances end the moment the interest in the sport is over. A law of human nature, they claim. It’s now that the flashy cell phones and car’s in the driveway matter so what would the star bowler who they treated like a precious gem when kids from the neighboring locality come over for a match have to do with them. He’s long forgotten. Another thing to note nowadays is the fact that, speaking with reference to only cities, the age at which kids lose their ‘innocence’ drops by a month at least annually. This ‘awakening’ of theirs happens quite suddenly and the transition is abrupt and quite noticeable. Also , kids, I should say teens have made a giant leap in terms of social and sexual activities as compared to their counterparts a decade back. I, speaking at a personal level have friends who are seventeen and talk in terms of their gully cricket days as if a lifetime has passed since then. The reason why I choose to talk about cricket(mind you, the kind which involves “COSCO” balls and undulating wickets etched out on the wall of some creepy neighbor whose either bathing her pet mongrels or screaming at urchins who miraculously turn up only in front of her house) is that I figure as my life stands now, if I was allowed to relive any phase of my life, it would most certainly be that. I haven’t exactly been along for long but seemingly have the right to claim that those quite clearly were the least complicated, most fun of the times I’ve had. Then again, if you’re that pathetic kid who doesn’t get picked on a side and people fight over not wanting you in the team , well then….at least grow up and make a lot of money. And I wish you the best of luck at doing that.
Shantanu Anam

Sunday, January 3, 2010


Hi guys, i am a regular 19 year old who with a rather irregular academic life as of now.This phase is one which is facilitating a significant amount of time to introspect ...the result of which being this.I always believed there is a need for one to be a able channelize their pent up emotions and frustration(hell.yeah.) in a way that is..if not very constructive..atleast not self destructive.
I saw 3Idiots a while back and honestly thought it was rather nice but lacked a sense of realism.I know..kill me ..but those of you have been to professional colleges especially those associated with technology driven courses,would realize ALL IZZ NOT well.In fact,im not Chetan Bhagat's biggest fan considering the rubbish he forced upon us with the senseless 2 states,but it would be fair to say that he managed to highlight the darker sides to college life rather well.Well,that was his story,i dont have one as of now.What I also dont have is an ability to draw inspiration from others lives and stories,in fact that is something that always irked me.Why would I make a decision in life based on what a completely different individual would have made in the same situation.Since childhood, Ive been told that there are three kinds of people in the world,those who are smart and learn from others mistakes,those who learn from their own mistakes and then theres me.Well, mistakes can categorized on who faces the consequences of the mistake.Their are mistakes which can effect people other than you and repetiton of these mistakes is unpardonable but what about those which affect only the person himself.Instead of dubbing him a jackass or calling him Harman Baweja behind his back,why can't one try and figure out the persons psyche and what he looks for everytime he falters.Another question is what is the system!!blame the system!!a girl died...blame the system...i dropped out of an engineering college..mainly due to pathetic performances which i wasnt used...why do i have feeling that there are other people in my situation who blame the SYSTEM....except aaj tak correspondants,i think no one knows the real meaning of it.WHY INTERVIEW THE HRD MINISTER IF A NERVOUS KID COMMITS if lovely jee's tweaking a rule here and there could save a nervous underperforming kids life,then his place is booked in MARVEL COMICS as a new superhero in my opinion....
Thats it then, for those of you on facebook,i suggest you join this times of india initiative called aman ki asha...It's trying to achieve something rather brilliant..anyway..its way better than being on farmville guys.
A new celina Jaitley movie released this week.For those of you watch it.
Best of luck